DON'T BE AFRAID TO LOVE

What is wrong with me? This is the question I always ask myself when I try to understand love. Feeling afraid to love is something impossible for me to avoid, but I always try to do my best. I know very well that I am not perfect, and I do not try to be. I just want to know how can I face my fears. But since I was a child, my mom has taught me that I should not trust strangers and to be cautious. In this essay first, I will explain what is fear of love; then, I will tell you what are the consequences of the fear of loving; and finally, I will explain how we can face our fears.

Given the possibility of falling in love, we feel a fear that throws it back, because we feel vulnerable. For this reason, sometimes we decide to get away from people as quickly as possible. The times I have tried to love, it makes me feel weak. For me, the best way to stay safe is to run away from love, break the relationship and keep my heart safe. All of this because of past relationships that have left an indelible mark on me. When I was 16 years old, I had my first boyfriend, everything was nice and I felt happy. We were together for 3 years; but when the relationship began to get complicated because jealousy and insecurities, we decided to leave the relationship. It was the best for both of us, but I must admit, it hurt a lot. After that, I felt calmer with myself, but that breakup left me with insecurities that I did not have, like feeling alone and the insecurity of abandonment. Feeling afraid is not bad, but not knowing how to face is.

The fear of loving can bring some consequences for our emotional development. For example, feeling alone, because we think that we do not deserve love. For me the best way to keep myself safe has always to run away from love. But at the same time, I know, I am losing out on experiences. It should not be so, because I can always learn from good experiences as well as from bad experiences. Rejecting love deprives us of maintaining healthy relationships not only as a couple but also in other intimate relationships. Sometimes, it is hard for me to be able to surround myself with people who I can trust, which it makes me insecure. For me, it is important to keep people who I love close. But I do not want to get hurt.

I have always been shy, which is something that has not helped me when I have to meet people. But I was also able to realize that in order not to hurt people I love, I need to be more responsible and learn to face my fears. The first step to overcome our fears is to decide to face them with fear or without it. We need to be rational and apply emotional intelligence to understand what we are feeling to be more understanding and empathetic. Seek professional help; sometimes, it can help us to identify our fears. My best advice is we should enjoy our lives with the good and bad, because we are young and we have a long way to go. Do not be afraid to feel. Do not be afraid to feel loved. Do not be afraid to love. This is our life and our heart. We can decide who and how and in what way to let someone in.

In a nutshell, love is scary, and it requires commitment and patience. So, when we hear the word forever, it makes it harder to understand, and it easy to make us afraid. It is important that we see the positive in all this to be happier. Fall in love with people and trust in their goodness.